The Sarge drops some E3 impressions on you like a 10 ton napalm warhead. But instead of trudging through the sandy urban jungle fighting an unseen enemy, The Sarge fought his way through throngs of sweaty nerds and a maze of LCD screens to bring back his report on what games passes or fails the grade. Pay attention soldier! Because what The Sarge says may save your life, or at least $50.

Dirge of Cerberus (PS2)
This installment in the FFXII story line focuses on Vincent Valentine and his ability to blow the stuffing out of all who stand in his way, first and third person shooter style. The demo offered at E3 2006 was a quick tour (about 15 to 20 min of gamy play) and for time sake I mainly stuck to the game play elements as opposed to the story line. The controls, while not as refined as some shooters, were intuitive and easy to adjust to. When Valentine's limit break is used, he turns into a ferocious beast that throws fireballs and rips the enemy apart with his claws.

Dungeons & Dragons Online (PC)
The boys at Turbine have some great things in store for us DDO freaks. They will be releasing a new upgrade in the near future with more dungeons and a new race, Drow. Yes now all you chaotic good players can start a race of good Drow, like there aren’t enough already.

Solomon Says (PC), Dance Praise (PC)
Bill, a co-owner sold me on his company, Digital Praise. His company has begun to create the first actual non-biased Bible trivia game. I know that is hard to believe but it's true. The games need to be refined a bit but just you wait and Protestants, Jews, and Catholics will come a running to get the products that this company is offering.

America's Army CROW system (Real World)
While roaming the backroom halls of this convention center, I found something right up The Sarge's IED infested alley. In the Americas Army office I was able to demo the US Army’s CROW system which allows for a HMMWV gunner to remain in the relative safety of interior as opposed to the gunner’s turret through use of a screen, joystick, and a powerful motorized turret. The turret can be used with a .50 caliber machine gun and a MK19 40mm grenade machine gun as well as several other weapons systems. This former SSG - that's Staff Sergeant to you civilians - approves of the system for all our poor gunners out there who have had to put up with rain, sandstorms, IEDs, sniper fire, and being the number 1 target selection of the enemy. If you want to stop playing these sissy simulations, this will ease you in the transition from gamer to killing machine.

Bomberman 360 (Xbox 360)
This classic puzzle game will be well worth the buy when it starts to get on the discount self. Hours could be spent playing this game and that’s no lie. I may know a little something about avoiding bomb traps, but none of that experience ever came in handy in this game.

Pac-Man World Rally (PS2, Xbox)
Five words can some up this game: Mario Kart with Pac-man characters. This game is a good buy for people who love a good racing game and have conquered all that Mario Kart has to offer. I was given the dubious honor of playing the game in a relay contest at E3. The winner took home a gas-powered go kart, while the runner up won a cash prize. I was told we have video of this event, but the slackers at this website can't find the motivation to finish editing all of the footage from E3. Get to work or The Sarge will come after you!

Overall, E3 was a Geek-gasm of fun and excitement for the whole gaming community, from the fat RPGers to the hardcore FPS fans. Sony, let down. Nintendo, revolutionary. Square Enix, expected greatness.